Ladies and gentlewomen, boys and girls and kids!
It is I, Abrahama Lincolnstein the second, addressing you through your tube radios today!
It has been a long while since we last spoke. Too long of a while.
Let I (ME) update you on our ongoing battle with CREATU!
By the brow of this beard, I sadly must report that we are not fighting HARD enough!
The enemy is growing. They have the bombs. They have the will to destroy you.
MY FIST IS A CLEAVER!
*BAM!*
You are tired... I know. And... LAZY!
We need to cut through the ramsuckles and shiftninnies and bring this war to a head, from the floors of our factory doors to the cabs of our CARS!
WORK will fill your hands with freedom, and WORK shall fill our soldier's hearts with STRENGTH!
I SHALL LIFT YOU UPON THESE SHOULDERS LIKE NINE TIGERS!
REJOICE WITH ME! (Catsup clan.)
They want war?
WAR IS HERE! HERE IS WAR!
And you shall earn it!
From this day forward we shall re-triple our efforts and embrace the labors that make MONSTRU grand!
We shall dig holes and build walls and tap bombs and rivet sleeves and shatter doors and break down the flotsam flowers ZZZZZZZT! Cht!
Fzzzzzzllllll.
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This concludes Lincolnstein's seven hour speech. Join us again tomorrow to be inspired by Our Great Leader.
