There are seven things that every child must learn about Abraham Lincolnstein:
- He is a war hero. He is THE war hero. From a big war.
- He can lift more than any past Monstru leader.
- Lincolnstein can throw a grenade over those mountains over there.
- He is a gentle giant.
- Unless he's mad, then he's an insane warrior-hero.
- Abe prefers tea over other sauces.
- He lives in his office, working endless hours from Lincoln City to protect your liberties.
- We had to rebuild him so that he could serve us faithfully once again.